BRIDGING THE GAP BETWEEN CONFLICT
& RESOLUTION TO KEEP FOCUSED
ON WHAT MATTERS MOST
Divorce is one of the most traumatic times in a family’s life because it signals the end of the traditional family structure. During the traditional divorce process, conflicts are ignited by powerful emotions that instill the need to win or lose.
Divorce Mediation vs. The Legal Adversarial Approach
Divorce Mediation is an effective and inexpensive approach to bring marriage to a conclusion. If you have reached that point where you feel there is no other option, Divorce Mediation can help you through this transition, without adding any of the undue cost and added stress that the adversarial approach brings.
The process of adversarial litigation, where each person hires a lawyer, can exacerbate anxiety, confrontation and doubt. This can set the couple up to be as rivals in a battle to see who can get the most. By definition, the adversarial rout is concerned about you winning, and gets well paid to make sure that you do. Unfortunately, your partner’s lawyer has the same objective.
Although we can’t really fault the legal profession for doing what they were hired to do, we can endeavor to control our own fate by attempting to dissolve the marriage in the least time consuming, most cost effective way possible, without adding any undue stress into the situation.
The Divorce Mediation Process
A successful and cost effective alternative to adversarial litigation is Mediation.
Kimanne Foraker-Koons, Founder of Family Strategies is a trained mediator who is a firm believer in the power of mediation because it allows participants to be in control of their future. Ms. Foraker-Koons helps couples plan their future during what is obviously a very difficult transitional period in their lives. It is usually quicker and less expensive than litigation and results in mutually satisfying family agreements.
Divorce Mediation allows families to move on with their lives by
- transforming anxiety into anticipation,
- confrontation into conversation,
- and doubt into decision-making.
As a skilled mediator, Ms. Foraker-Koons has several years of experience guiding couples through the marriage dissolution process, including the following outcomes.
- assists with financial issues that affect families during this trying time
- recognizes the needs of children during and after divorce
- expertly facilitates discussions that relate to finances, children and the future
- redirects emotionally charged topics into constructive communication
- guides meaningful conversation into mutually satisfying agreements.
Kimanne believes that divorce is a time to restructure the family dynamics, and as a mediator, her role is to help families build a plan together for their future.
What are the Benefits?
Many reasons are cited to support the growth of mediation as a voluntary option for divorcing couples who seek resolution of their disputes. A mediated divorce …
- enables individuals to emerge from a divorce with self-respect intact.
- protects family relationships while helping a couple end their relationship as husband and wife. Mediation also establishes a foundation for continued co-parenting.
- focuses on the present and future, not the past. Mediation helps individuals let go of their past and direct their energies toward independent futures.
- avoids the polarizing tendencies of the adversary system. Mediation results in agreements to which people are committed, which reduces post-divorce conflict and litigation.
- is time limited. You get to resolution quicker; therefore reducing the uncertainty for the family and minimizing confusion for the children.
- offers an informal context for reaching agreement, such a setting is both confidential and convenient.
- allows for more control over the costs of the process. For many people, the cost of obtaining a settlement through the adversary system is high – both financially and emotionally.
- is empowering. Mediation recognizes that both parties have legitimate needs and helps develop options to meet those needs.
- is creative. Agreements are reached and developed based on the needs of the individual family.
- is more successful. Mediation settlements often prove more successful than court-settled cases. It seems that when both parties participate in the decisions, both usually fulfill their part of the agreement.
…And not to mention…
- Less Stress In mediation, YOU mold the solution; in litigation you are told the solution.
- Less Time In mediation, you deal with only YOUR schedules, in litigation, you maneuver through schedules for 2 lawyers or more and trial judges.
- Less Money Mediation costs less per hour than having two attorneys battle in court.
- Less Future Frustration Mediation gives the disputants a model for future conflict resolution.
- More Privacy Mediation is entirely confidential. There is no airing the “dirty laundry” to a full courtroom, like in litigation.
- Win/Win Results Mediation focuses on obtaining results that are acceptable to all parties involved. In litigation, there is a winner and a loser.
Is it time to take the next step towards solving conflict and getting on with your life? Contact Family Strategies and take the next step forward towards results.